November 14, 2015

About “She’s Not Sorry”

My favorite words used to be and sometimes still are: I’m Sorry.  Over the silliest things my mouth would instantly pour out: I’m Sorry.  If a friend would trip over something on the ground, I would look and say: “I’m sorry.” I would sing a certain part in a song during a rehearsal and right after I was finished an “I’m sorry” would spill out. Now imagine the awkward tension I would release every time I opened my mouth and blurted, “I’m Sorry.” Even reading this now- I’m sure you’re thinking “That’s a lot of I’m sorrys.” Others would constantly look at me and say, “You don’t have to be sorry. Why are you sorry?”

The truth was that I was sorry about who I was as a whole; Surely the mouth speaks what the heart is full of.

My heart was packed with untold memories and hurt that couldn’t be put to words. Sexual abuse, fatherlessness and instability; All things that told me my circumstances were indeed pitiful, shameful and something not to be proud of. However, the Truth was, I was not called to be identified by my past or present circumstances; I am not pitiful – I am not ashamed and I certainly should not have been Sorry for who God called me to be.

This blog is for every woman who at one point or another has had to look into her pits of shame, hopelessness, guilt, fear, uncertainty, distress, frustration, loneliness, abuse, and turn them into wells of life-giving water.

She’s Not Sorry is about redemption.

She’s Not Sorry is about moving forward beyond the hurt.

She’s Not Sorry is about victory.

She’s Not Sorry is about believing you are a new creation, believing the old has passed away and the new has come.

She’s Not Sorry is about living unapologetically.

She’s Not Sorry is about using your story to help get someone else up out of the pit.

She’s Not Sorry is about knowing that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to his purpose.

She’s Not Sorry is about looking back at what use to be a field of pits of distress, and seeing a field of Life giving wells others are constantly drinking from and being changed.

Ultimately She’s Not Sorry is about YOUR life-changing story.

Are you ready?

I know I am, and I’m not sorry.